Deciding to take out a joint mortgage with a partner is always a huge milestone in any relationship, but how do you know when you’re truly ready for such a significant step in life?
To help those considering the leap, Barratt Homes has teamed up with leading mortgage and relationship experts to answer the most frequently asked questions about moving in with a partner, gathered from analysing over 3,000 Reddit comments.
Barratt also surveyed 500 homeowners about when they felt comfortable moving in with their partner and the key reasons why they wanted to move in. Below are the key findings:
- The average couple dates for at least one year before moving in together.
- Almost one in three Brits (27%) say they have regretted moving in with a partner.
- The top reason for moving in together is spending more time with a partner (37%), followed by starting a family (23%).
How do you know when it is the right time to move in with a partner?
Buying a new home together can be a daunting decision. Relationship expert Jessica Alderson, co-founder of the dating app So Syncd, stresses the importance of taking time before making any decision on moving in together.
She said, “Trust, communication, and long-term compatibility are essential when taking this step. A joint mortgage should feel like a natural progression in your relationship—not a way to fix underlying issues. If there’s instability in the relationship, it’s often wise to wait.”
Meanwhile, mortgage expert Terry Higgins, MD at The New Homes Group, stresses how emotional readiness is key to approaching financial commitments like a mortgage:
“Before committing to a joint mortgage, it’s essential for both parties to align on financial stability, credit scores, long-term goals, and legal responsibilities.
“Open communication, trust, and clear agreements help ensure both are emotionally and financially prepared for the shared commitment and any challenges that may arise.”
Questions to ask yourselves:
- Do we have a clear and shared vision for our future?
- Are we aligned on long-term goals, like career plans, children, and where we want to live?
- Is there mutual trust and open communication in our relationship?
How should we fairly split household expenses and deposit payments if there’s a significant income difference?
It’s common for couples to have different financial circumstances, whether one partner earns more, has better credit, or can contribute more towards a deposit.
Jessica explains:
“The key to managing these differences is communication and fairness. You want to ensure that both partners feel comfortable with the arrangement so that resentment doesn’t build up over time.
“Fairness depends on what feels right for both partners. Equal contributions aren’t always practical, so talk openly about what works for you.”
Terry advises:
“From a financial perspective, it’s crucial to document your contributions, especially if one partner is contributing significantly more to the deposit. Legal agreements such as tenants-in-common or joint tenancy can protect both parties and help avoid disputes later.
“Tenants-in-common (TIC) is a legal arrangement where two or more individuals jointly own a property together, but each has a separate share. With this share, the individual can sell or reserve the right to pass it on to their heir.
“In contrast to this, a joint tenancy is where each owner owns the whole property rather than a separate share. Unlike TIC, which passes the share to the next of kin, in this instance their joint share automatically transfers to the other individual.”
Terry also adds:
“A good mortgage broker will also talk you through the different types of mortgage payment protection insurance as well as life insurance and critical illness cover. Mortgage payment protection insurance can cover the cost of your mortgage if you become unwell or lose your job.”
Strategies for navigating differences:
- Equal ownership vs proportional contributions: Decide whether to split ownership equally or reflect contributions in the ownership percentage.
- Legal agreements: For unmarried couples, consider a legal agreement outlining contributions and ownership to protect both parties.
- Discuss future expectations: Will you contribute equally to renovations or other costs?
What financial preparations should we make before buying a home?
Before signing on the dotted line, couples should have open discussions about money, their relationship, and their vision for homeownership.
Jessica says:
“Owning a home together is a huge commitment, so you need to ensure that your visions for the future align. You also want to approach these challenges as a team and be willing to adapt your plans as needed. Misaligned goals can lead to stress and conflict down the line.”
Terry adds:
“Beyond emotional alignment, financial alignment is critical. Couples often overlook how decisions like mortgage type or property taxes will affect their budget. Discussing these details early can save a lot of stress later.”
Key topics to cover:
- Financial disclosures: Share details about income, debt, savings, and credit scores.
- Long-term plans: Discuss how homeownership fits into your future as a couple.
- Home preferences: Agree on location, size, and budget for the home.
- Contingency planning: Create a plan for unexpected events like breakups or job loss.
- Daily financial management: Decide how bills, taxes, and expenses will be split.