According to the Imperial College Business School, 17 million people have signed up to an online dating site, just in the UK.
The digital dating revolution has led to 1 in 3 romantic relationships starting behind a screen, seeing that digital dating is the most popular way to meet a partner in the UK, (ONS) surpassing its previous successor, meeting in the workplace.
Such a demand in the online dating arena gives way to scammers working to take advantage of users. In fact, research by Action Fraud reveals that romance scams cost their victims £27 million last year, with the average victim losing £11,500 (National Fraud Intelligence Bureau’s 2024 report).
University of Westminster suggests as many as 85% of romance scams go unreported due to shame and embarrassment.
Here, Paul Gray at Chums presents the 5 warning signs that you may be a romance scammer’s next victim.
No Internet, a Broken Camera & Insecurity
Scammers typically hide behind a gallery of photos that they have stolen from a stranger to disguise their identity. Scammers using this tactic will never show their (real) face on camera, often proclaiming that their phone camera is broken, they don’t have sufficient internet or that they are too insecure to show their face.
On a Pedestal
Initially, the scammers’ objective is to make you feel very important and special so that they fast become your main point of focus. Ultimately, they want to create such intense bond, the status of the relationship quickly increases.
Love Bombing
Often, scammers will ‘love bomb’ you by sending surprise gifts and making bold declarations of love. They will claim that no one understands your relationship and that they are jealous, working to isolate you from friends and family. This tactic ensures that no one you trust can voice their suspicions or remove you from the relationship.
They work VERY Remotely
Scammers claim to lead such a unique life, that it’s previously prevented them from forming romantic relationships in the past. It’s common that they will try to convince you that are working in a remote location, navigating a sudden family crisis, or jumping to someone’s aid. They will use these elaborate stories as leverage, so they don’t have to meet up with you.
They Pay You Back, Until They Don’t
Usually, the scammers hardships gradually build, before finally making their financial request. The request will likely start small, however it will soon escalate to large sums that they need immediately, for an unforeseen emergency. The scammer will always promise to repay you, and sometimes even make the initial payments before asking you for more money that they will never pay back.
5 Ways to Safeguard Yourself from Romance Scams
Authenticate their identity Early.
We live in a digital age where people even in the remotest parts of the world have internet access. Request a video call early in the relationship and if they refuse, consider it a red flag.
Conduct a reverse image search with the pictures they send. The results will allow you to view where else the images are online, helping to establish if the person is who they say they are.
Never send money – no exceptions.
Once you are invested in a relationship, both emotionally and in time, it can be easy to convince yourself that sending some money, just this once, is fine. Ultimately, if you have never met in person, multiple times, there is no logical reason to transfer money to them and if they ask, this is a major red flag.
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask.
Scammers somewhat rely on your isolation. Don’t be afraid to ask friends or family their opinion on your circumstance. Gaining an outside perspective is a great way of identifying potential warning signs that you may miss if you’re emotionally invested.
Report, Report, Report.
If you encounter any suspicious behaviour, make sure that you press the report button.
Asses What You Deem Personal
Before you join a dating platform, make a list of everything that you deem personal information. This is prescriptive to you, and can be anything from your address to your phone number. Before sharing information with anyone, refer to your list to double check if you really wish to share the info.